I can't find the message below on my computer, and -- I bloody posted
it!! -- Google Groups search denies it exists. I mean, it's got such
lterary merit, it should be preserved for posterity.

Do you have this censorship problem, or is it just in my STINKING POXY
system?

------------------

Title:- " I now think that the theory of relativity is simply gay !"

Gerry Lintonice wrote:
Yes, this theory is just the exact description of a homosexual love
between two men. One dick flying with the speed of light into an
asshole (black hole).

Simple.The Greek knew this 2500 years ago...

# We're the Flintstones, we're the Flintstones,
# We'll have a gay old time!

Mahmoud In My Dinner Jacket, , the hard-baked,
chubby skull****er, and silkworm breeder, made public:

I can't find the message below on my computer, and -- I bloody posted
it!! -- Google Groups search denies it exists. I mean, it's got such
lterary merit, it should be preserved for posterity.

Do you have this censorship problem, or is it just in my STINKING POXY
system?

Do you use linux or own a Mac by any chance, you less than ****ing useless
pillock?

http://groups.google.com/group/sci.p...hread/thread/e
9746d2b2f55e203/963be1f67e87982c?lnk=st&q=%22One+dick+flying+with+ the+speed+
of+light+into+an%22&rnum=1&hl=en#963be1f67e87982c

http://groups.google.com/group/sci.p...e1f67e87982c?h
l=en&

oups.com

--
Pierre Salinger Memorial HL&S, September 2005.

DISCLAIMER: The content does not reflect the thoughts or opinions of either
my ISP, myself, my company or employer, my friends (if any,) my goldfish or
my neighbour's mad dog; don't quote me on that; don't quote me on anything;
all rights reserved; the post is distribution copyrighted to the extent that
you may distribute the post and all its associated parts freely but you may
not make a profit from it or include the post in commercial publications
without written permission from the Prime Minister of Hutt Province; other
copyright laws for specific posts apply wherever noted or not noted, either
deliberately, negligently, or otherwise; posts are subject to change without
notice; posts are slightly enlarged to show detail; any resemblance to
actual persons, living or dead, is unintentional and purely coincidental;
hand wash only, tumble dry on low heat; do not bend, fold, mutilate, or
spindle; do not pass go; do not collect $200; your mileage may vary; no
substitutions allowed; for a limited time only; the post is void where
prohibited, taxed, or otherwise restricted; the post is provided "as is"
without any warranties expressed or implied; user assumes full liabilities;
not liable for damages due to use or misuse; an equal opportunity abuse
employer; no shoes, no shirt; quantities are limited while supplies last; if
defects are discovered, do not attempt to fix them yourself but return to an
authorised post service centre; caveat emptor; read at your own risk;
parental advisory - explicit words; text may contain material some readers
may find objectionable, parental guidance is advised; not suitable for
children; not suitable for adults; not for human consumption; keep away from
sunlight, pets and small children; limit one-per-family; no money down; no
purchase necessary; to approved purchasers only; facsimiles are acceptable
in South Australia; you need not be present to read this post; some assembly
required; batteries not included; action figures sold separately; no
preservatives added; tools not included; safety goggles may be required
during use; sealed for your protection, do not use if the safety seal is
broken; call before you dig; for external use only; if a rash, redness,
irritation or swelling develops, discontinue use; use only with proper
ventilation; avoid extreme temperatures and store in a cool, dry place; keep
away from open flames, naked flames and old flames; avoid inhaling fumes;
avoid contact with mucous membranes; do not puncture, incinerate, or store
above 60 degrees Centigrade; do not place near flammable or magnetic source;
smoking the post may be hazardous to your health; the best safeguard, second
only to abstinence, is the use of a good laugh; text used on the post is
made from 100% recycled electrons and magnetic particles; no animals were
used to test the hilarity of this post other than Synapse Syndrome; no salt,
MSG, artificial colour or flavour added; may contain traces of replies to
peanuts; if ingested, do not induce vomiting, if symptoms persist, consult
your humourologist; post is ribbed for your pleasure; slippery when wet;
must be 18 to read; possible penalties for early withdrawal; post offer
valid only in participating newsgroups; slightly higher in South Australia;
allow four to six weeks for delivery; damage from hurricane, lightning,
tornado, tsunami, volcanic eruption, earthquake, flood, orgasm, misuse,
self-abuse, neglect, unauthorised repair, damage from improper installation,
broken antenna, marred cabinet, incorrect line voltage, missing or altered
serial numbers, sonic boom vibrations, electromagnetic radiation from
nuclear blasts or other Acts of God are not covered; incidents owing to
aeroplane crash, ship sinking, motor vehicle accidents, leaky roof, broken
glass, falling rocks, mud slides, forest fire, flying projectiles or
dropping the item are also excluded; other restrictions may apply. If
something offends you, lighten up, get a life, and move on. All conditions
apply. Not available in all stores. Facts have been changed to protect the
guilty.

Kadaitcha Man wrote:
Mahmoud In My Dinner Jacket, , the hard-baked,
chubby skull****er, and silkworm breeder, made public:

I can't find the message below on my computer, and -- I bloody posted
it!! -- Google Groups search denies it exists. I mean, it's got such
lterary merit, it should be preserved for posterity.

Do you have this censorship problem, or is it just in my STINKING POXY
system?

Do you use linux or own a Mac by any chance, you less than ****ing useless
pillock?

No, you total jackworm masturbator, shut your face or I'll recite you
my epic poem-cycle on how I found a piece of green putty in my left
armpit.

Mahmoud In My Dinner Jacket, , the intolerable,
stuck hugger-mugger, and servant responsible for emptying and cleaning
chamber pots, fulminated:


Kadaitcha Man wrote:
Mahmoud In My Dinner Jacket, , the hard-baked,
chubby skull****er, and silkworm breeder, made public:

I can't find the message below on my computer, and -- I bloody posted
it!! -- Google Groups search denies it exists. I mean, it's got such
lterary merit, it should be preserved for posterity.

Do you have this censorship problem, or is it just in my STINKING POXY
system?

Do you use linux or own a Mac by any chance, you less than ****ing
useless pillock?

No,

I say you're a ****ing liar.

you total jackworm masturbator,

Didn't take much to shove your head into your groin, did it, eh.

shut your face or

Or what, pussy boy?

I'll recite you
my epic poem-cycle on how I found a piece of green putty in my left
armpit.

That isn't putty. It's a canker.

--
Pierre Salinger Memorial HL&S, September 2005.

DISCLAIMER: The content does not reflect the thoughts or opinions of either
my ISP, myself, my company or employer, my friends (if any,) my goldfish or
my neighbour's mad dog; don't quote me on that; don't quote me on anything;
all rights reserved; the post is distribution copyrighted to the extent that
you may distribute the post and all its associated parts freely but you may
not make a profit from it or include the post in commercial publications
without written permission from the Prime Minister of Hutt Province; other
copyright laws for specific posts apply wherever noted or not noted, either
deliberately, negligently, or otherwise; posts are subject to change without
notice; posts are slightly enlarged to show detail; any resemblance to
actual persons, living or dead, is unintentional and purely coincidental;
hand wash only, tumble dry on low heat; do not bend, fold, mutilate, or
spindle; do not pass go; do not collect $200; your mileage may vary; no
substitutions allowed; for a limited time only; the post is void where
prohibited, taxed, or otherwise restricted; the post is provided "as is"
without any warranties expressed or implied; user assumes full liabilities;
not liable for damages due to use or misuse; an equal opportunity abuse
employer; no shoes, no shirt; quantities are limited while supplies last; if
defects are discovered, do not attempt to fix them yourself but return to an
authorised post service centre; caveat emptor; read at your own risk;
parental advisory - explicit words; text may contain material some readers
may find objectionable, parental guidance is advised; not suitable for
children; not suitable for adults; not for human consumption; keep away from
sunlight, pets and small children; limit one-per-family; no money down; no
purchase necessary; to approved purchasers only; facsimiles are acceptable
in South Australia; you need not be present to read this post; some assembly
required; batteries not included; action figures sold separately; no
preservatives added; tools not included; safety goggles may be required
during use; sealed for your protection, do not use if the safety seal is
broken; call before you dig; for external use only; if a rash, redness,
irritation or swelling develops, discontinue use; use only with proper
ventilation; avoid extreme temperatures and store in a cool, dry place; keep
away from open flames, naked flames and old flames; avoid inhaling fumes;
avoid contact with mucous membranes; do not puncture, incinerate, or store
above 60 degrees Centigrade; do not place near flammable or magnetic source;
smoking the post may be hazardous to your health; the best safeguard, second
only to abstinence, is the use of a good laugh; text used on the post is
made from 100% recycled electrons and magnetic particles; no animals were
used to test the hilarity of this post other than Synapse Syndrome; no salt,
MSG, artificial colour or flavour added; may contain traces of replies to
peanuts; if ingested, do not induce vomiting, if symptoms persist, consult
your humourologist; post is ribbed for your pleasure; slippery when wet;
must be 18 to read; possible penalties for early withdrawal; post offer
valid only in participating newsgroups; slightly higher in South Australia;
allow four to six weeks for delivery; damage from hurricane, lightning,
tornado, tsunami, volcanic eruption, earthquake, flood, orgasm, misuse,
self-abuse, neglect, unauthorised repair, damage from improper installation,
broken antenna, marred cabinet, incorrect line voltage, missing or altered
serial numbers, sonic boom vibrations, electromagnetic radiation from
nuclear blasts or other Acts of God are not covered; incidents owing to
aeroplane crash, ship sinking, motor vehicle accidents, leaky roof, broken
glass, falling rocks, mud slides, forest fire, flying projectiles or
dropping the item are also excluded; other restrictions may apply. If
something offends you, lighten up, get a life, and move on. All conditions
apply. Not available in all stores. Facts have been changed to protect the
guilty.

Kadaitcha Man wrote:
Mahmoud In My Dinner Jacket, , the intolerable,
stuck hugger-mugger, and servant responsible for emptying and cleaning
chamber pots, fulminated:


Kadaitcha Man wrote:
Mahmoud In My Dinner Jacket, , the hard-baked,
chubby skull****er, and silkworm breeder, made public:

I can't find the message below on my computer, and -- I bloody posted
it!! -- Google Groups search denies it exists. I mean, it's got such
lterary merit, it should be preserved for posterity.

Do you have this censorship problem, or is it just in my STINKING POXY
system?

Do you use linux or own a Mac by any chance, you less than ****ing
useless pillock?

No,

I say you're a ****ing liar.

you total jackworm masturbator,

Didn't take much to shove your head into your groin, did it, eh.

shut your face or

Or what, pussy boy?

I'll recite you
my epic poem-cycle on how I found a piece of green putty in my left
armpit.

That isn't putty. It's a canker.

Rhymes with it, anyway! ;-)

Mahmoud In My Dinner Jacket, , the drowsy,
left-slanting flipper, and oxherder, toadied:
Kadaitcha Man wrote:
Mahmoud In My Dinner Jacket, , the
intolerable, stuck hugger-mugger, and servant responsible for
emptying and cleaning chamber pots, fulminated:


Kadaitcha Man wrote:
Mahmoud In My Dinner Jacket, , the
hard-baked, chubby skull****er, and silkworm breeder, made public:

I can't find the message below on my computer, and -- I bloody
posted it!! -- Google Groups search denies it exists. I mean,
it's got such lterary merit, it should be preserved for posterity.

Do you have this censorship problem, or is it just in my STINKING
POXY system?

Do you use linux or own a Mac by any chance, you less than ****ing
useless pillock?

No,

I say you're a ****ing liar.

you total jackworm masturbator,

Didn't take much to shove your head into your groin, did it, eh.

shut your face or

Or what, pussy boy?

I'll recite you
my epic poem-cycle on how I found a piece of green putty in my left
armpit.

That isn't putty. It's a canker.

Rhymes with it, anyway! ;-)

Tell me when to laugh.

--
Pierre Salinger Memorial HL&S, September 2005.

DISCLAIMER: The content does not reflect the thoughts or opinions of either
my ISP, myself, my company or employer, my friends (if any,) my goldfish or
my neighbour's mad dog; don't quote me on that; don't quote me on anything;
all rights reserved; the post is distribution copyrighted to the extent that
you may distribute the post and all its associated parts freely but you may
not make a profit from it or include the post in commercial publications
without written permission from the Prime Minister of Hutt Province; other
copyright laws for specific posts apply wherever noted or not noted, either
deliberately, negligently, or otherwise; posts are subject to change without
notice; posts are slightly enlarged to show detail; any resemblance to
actual persons, living or dead, is unintentional and purely coincidental;
hand wash only, tumble dry on low heat; do not bend, fold, mutilate, or
spindle; do not pass go; do not collect $200; your mileage may vary; no
substitutions allowed; for a limited time only; the post is void where
prohibited, taxed, or otherwise restricted; the post is provided "as is"
without any warranties expressed or implied; user assumes full liabilities;
not liable for damages due to use or misuse; an equal opportunity abuse
employer; no shoes, no shirt; quantities are limited while supplies last; if
defects are discovered, do not attempt to fix them yourself but return to an
authorised post service centre; caveat emptor; read at your own risk;
parental advisory - explicit words; text may contain material some readers
may find objectionable, parental guidance is advised; not suitable for
children; not suitable for adults; not for human consumption; keep away from
sunlight, pets and small children; limit one-per-family; no money down; no
purchase necessary; to approved purchasers only; facsimiles are acceptable
in South Australia; you need not be present to read this post; some assembly
required; batteries not included; action figures sold separately; no
preservatives added; tools not included; safety goggles may be required
during use; sealed for your protection, do not use if the safety seal is
broken; call before you dig; for external use only; if a rash, redness,
irritation or swelling develops, discontinue use; use only with proper
ventilation; avoid extreme temperatures and store in a cool, dry place; keep
away from open flames, naked flames and old flames; avoid inhaling fumes;
avoid contact with mucous membranes; do not puncture, incinerate, or store
above 60 degrees Centigrade; do not place near flammable or magnetic source;
smoking the post may be hazardous to your health; the best safeguard, second
only to abstinence, is the use of a good laugh; text used on the post is
made from 100% recycled electrons and magnetic particles; no animals were
used to test the hilarity of this post other than Synapse Syndrome; no salt,
MSG, artificial colour or flavour added; may contain traces of replies to
peanuts; if ingested, do not induce vomiting, if symptoms persist, consult
your humourologist; post is ribbed for your pleasure; slippery when wet;
must be 18 to read; possible penalties for early withdrawal; post offer
valid only in participating newsgroups; slightly higher in South Australia;
allow four to six weeks for delivery; damage from hurricane, lightning,
tornado, tsunami, volcanic eruption, earthquake, flood, orgasm, misuse,
self-abuse, neglect, unauthorised repair, damage from improper installation,
broken antenna, marred cabinet, incorrect line voltage, missing or altered
serial numbers, sonic boom vibrations, electromagnetic radiation from
nuclear blasts or other Acts of God are not covered; incidents owing to
aeroplane crash, ship sinking, motor vehicle accidents, leaky roof, broken
glass, falling rocks, mud slides, forest fire, flying projectiles or
dropping the item are also excluded; other restrictions may apply. If
something offends you, lighten up, get a life, and move on. All conditions
apply. Not available in all stores. Facts have been changed to protect the
guilty.

Kadaitcha Man wrote:
Mahmoud In My Dinner Jacket, , the drowsy,
left-slanting flipper, and oxherder, toadied:
Kadaitcha Man wrote:
Mahmoud In My Dinner Jacket, , the
intolerable, stuck hugger-mugger, and servant responsible for
emptying and cleaning chamber pots, fulminated:


Kadaitcha Man wrote:
Mahmoud In My Dinner Jacket, , the
hard-baked, chubby skull****er, and silkworm breeder, made public:

I can't find the message below on my computer, and -- I bloody
posted it!! -- Google Groups search denies it exists. I mean,
it's got such lterary merit, it should be preserved for posterity.

Do you have this censorship problem, or is it just in my STINKING
POXY system?

Do you use linux or own a Mac by any chance, you less than ****ing
useless pillock?

No,

I say you're a ****ing liar.

you total jackworm masturbator,

Didn't take much to shove your head into your groin, did it, eh.

shut your face or

Or what, pussy boy?

I'll recite you
my epic poem-cycle on how I found a piece of green putty in my left
armpit.

That isn't putty. It's a canker.

Rhymes with it, anyway! ;-)

Tell me when to laugh.

You have my imperial permission to laugh at any point within the next
half hour.

Keep that feedback coming, Kadai, we value it.

Mahmoud In My Dinner Jacket, , the bogus,
****ed-up airhead, and employee who stiffens things by looking at them,
alluded:
Kadaitcha Man wrote:
Mahmoud In My Dinner Jacket, , the drowsy,
left-slanting flipper, and oxherder, toadied:
Kadaitcha Man wrote:
Mahmoud In My Dinner Jacket, , the
intolerable, stuck hugger-mugger, and servant responsible for
emptying and cleaning chamber pots, fulminated:


Kadaitcha Man wrote:
Mahmoud In My Dinner Jacket, , the
hard-baked, chubby skull****er, and silkworm breeder, made
public:

I can't find the message below on my computer, and -- I bloody
posted it!! -- Google Groups search denies it exists. I mean,
it's got such lterary merit, it should be preserved for
posterity.

Do you have this censorship problem, or is it just in my
STINKING POXY system?

Do you use linux or own a Mac by any chance, you less than
****ing useless pillock?

No,

I say you're a ****ing liar.

you total jackworm masturbator,

Didn't take much to shove your head into your groin, did it, eh.

shut your face or

Or what, pussy boy?

I'll recite you
my epic poem-cycle on how I found a piece of green putty in my
left armpit.

That isn't putty. It's a canker.

Rhymes with it, anyway! ;-)

Tell me when to laugh.

You have my imperial permission to laugh at any point within the next
half hour.

Fat lot of good it did you, eh.

Keep that feedback coming, Kadai, we value it.

--
Pierre Salinger Memorial HL&S, September 2005.

DISCLAIMER: The content does not reflect the thoughts or opinions of either
my ISP, myself, my company or employer, my friends (if any,) my goldfish or
my neighbour's mad dog; don't quote me on that; don't quote me on anything;
all rights reserved; the post is distribution copyrighted to the extent that
you may distribute the post and all its associated parts freely but you may
not make a profit from it or include the post in commercial publications
without written permission from the Prime Minister of Hutt Province; other
copyright laws for specific posts apply wherever noted or not noted, either
deliberately, negligently, or otherwise; posts are subject to change without
notice; posts are slightly enlarged to show detail; any resemblance to
actual persons, living or dead, is unintentional and purely coincidental;
hand wash only, tumble dry on low heat; do not bend, fold, mutilate, or
spindle; do not pass go; do not collect $200; your mileage may vary; no
substitutions allowed; for a limited time only; the post is void where
prohibited, taxed, or otherwise restricted; the post is provided "as is"
without any warranties expressed or implied; user assumes full liabilities;
not liable for damages due to use or misuse; an equal opportunity abuse
employer; no shoes, no shirt; quantities are limited while supplies last; if
defects are discovered, do not attempt to fix them yourself but return to an
authorised post service centre; caveat emptor; read at your own risk;
parental advisory - explicit words; text may contain material some readers
may find objectionable, parental guidance is advised; not suitable for
children; not suitable for adults; not for human consumption; keep away from
sunlight, pets and small children; limit one-per-family; no money down; no
purchase necessary; to approved purchasers only; facsimiles are acceptable
in South Australia; you need not be present to read this post; some assembly
required; batteries not included; action figures sold separately; no
preservatives added; tools not included; safety goggles may be required
during use; sealed for your protection, do not use if the safety seal is
broken; call before you dig; for external use only; if a rash, redness,
irritation or swelling develops, discontinue use; use only with proper
ventilation; avoid extreme temperatures and store in a cool, dry place; keep
away from open flames, naked flames and old flames; avoid inhaling fumes;
avoid contact with mucous membranes; do not puncture, incinerate, or store
above 60 degrees Centigrade; do not place near flammable or magnetic source;
smoking the post may be hazardous to your health; the best safeguard, second
only to abstinence, is the use of a good laugh; text used on the post is
made from 100% recycled electrons and magnetic particles; no animals were
used to test the hilarity of this post other than Synapse Syndrome; no salt,
MSG, artificial colour or flavour added; may contain traces of replies to
peanuts; if ingested, do not induce vomiting, if symptoms persist, consult
your humourologist; post is ribbed for your pleasure; slippery when wet;
must be 18 to read; possible penalties for early withdrawal; post offer
valid only in participating newsgroups; slightly higher in South Australia;
allow four to six weeks for delivery; damage from hurricane, lightning,
tornado, tsunami, volcanic eruption, earthquake, flood, orgasm, misuse,
self-abuse, neglect, unauthorised repair, damage from improper installation,
broken antenna, marred cabinet, incorrect line voltage, missing or altered
serial numbers, sonic boom vibrations, electromagnetic radiation from
nuclear blasts or other Acts of God are not covered; incidents owing to
aeroplane crash, ship sinking, motor vehicle accidents, leaky roof, broken
glass, falling rocks, mud slides, forest fire, flying projectiles or
dropping the item are also excluded; other restrictions may apply. If
something offends you, lighten up, get a life, and move on. All conditions
apply. Not available in all stores. Facts have been changed to protect the
guilty.

Kadaitcha Man wrote:
Mahmoud In My Dinner Jacket, , the bogus,
****ed-up airhead, and employee who stiffens things by looking at them,
alluded:
Kadaitcha Man wrote:
Mahmoud In My Dinner Jacket, , the drowsy,
left-slanting flipper, and oxherder, toadied:
Kadaitcha Man wrote:
Mahmoud In My Dinner Jacket, , the
intolerable, stuck hugger-mugger, and servant responsible for
emptying and cleaning chamber pots, fulminated:


Kadaitcha Man wrote:
Mahmoud In My Dinner Jacket, , the
hard-baked, chubby skull****er, and silkworm breeder, made
public:

I can't find the message below on my computer, and -- I bloody
posted it!! -- Google Groups search denies it exists. I mean,
it's got such lterary merit, it should be preserved for
posterity.

Do you have this censorship problem, or is it just in my
STINKING POXY system?

Do you use linux or own a Mac by any chance, you less than
****ing useless pillock?

No,

I say you're a ****ing liar.

you total jackworm masturbator,

Didn't take much to shove your head into your groin, did it, eh.

shut your face or

Or what, pussy boy?

I'll recite you
my epic poem-cycle on how I found a piece of green putty in my
left armpit.

That isn't putty. It's a canker.

Rhymes with it, anyway! ;-)

Tell me when to laugh.

You have my imperial permission to laugh at any point within the next
half hour.

Fat lot of good it did you, eh.

Actually, I'm on a diet.

Keep that feedback coming, Kadai, we value it.

Mahmoud In My Dinner Jacket, , the gorged,
lean-witted degenerate, and person who applies ornamental plaster to their
face to hide the horrendous acne, meandered:
Kadaitcha Man wrote:
Mahmoud In My Dinner Jacket, , the bogus,
****ed-up airhead, and employee who stiffens things by looking at
them, alluded:
Kadaitcha Man wrote:
Mahmoud In My Dinner Jacket, , the
drowsy, left-slanting flipper, and oxherder, toadied:
Kadaitcha Man wrote:
Mahmoud In My Dinner Jacket, , the
intolerable, stuck hugger-mugger, and servant responsible for
emptying and cleaning chamber pots, fulminated:


Kadaitcha Man wrote:
Mahmoud In My Dinner Jacket, , the
hard-baked, chubby skull****er, and silkworm breeder, made
public:

I can't find the message below on my computer, and -- I bloody
posted it!! -- Google Groups search denies it exists. I mean,
it's got such lterary merit, it should be preserved for
posterity.

Do you have this censorship problem, or is it just in my
STINKING POXY system?

Do you use linux or own a Mac by any chance, you less than
****ing useless pillock?

No,

I say you're a ****ing liar.

you total jackworm masturbator,

Didn't take much to shove your head into your groin, did it, eh.

shut your face or

Or what, pussy boy?

I'll recite you
my epic poem-cycle on how I found a piece of green putty in my
left armpit.

That isn't putty. It's a canker.

Rhymes with it, anyway! ;-)

Tell me when to laugh.

You have my imperial permission to laugh at any point within the
next half hour.

Fat lot of good it did you, eh.

Actually, I'm on a diet.

Fat lot of good it did you, eh.


Keep that feedback coming, Kadai, we value it.

--
DISCLAIMER: The content does not reflect the thoughts or opinions of either
my ISP, myself, my company or employer, my friends (if any,) my goldfish or
my neighbour's mad dog; don't quote me on that; don't quote me on anything;
all rights reserved; the post is distribution copyrighted to the extent that
you may distribute the post and all its associated parts freely but you may
not make a profit from it or include the post in commercial publications
without written permission from the Prime Minister of Hutt Province; other
copyright laws for specific posts apply wherever noted or not noted, either
deliberately, negligently, or otherwise; posts are subject to change without
notice; posts are slightly enlarged to show detail; any resemblance to
actual persons, living or dead, is unintentional and purely coincidental;
hand wash only, tumble dry on low heat; do not bend, fold, mutilate, or
spindle; do not pass go; do not collect $200; your mileage may vary; no
substitutions allowed; for a limited time only; the post is void where
prohibited, taxed, or otherwise restricted; the post is provided "as is"
without any warranties expressed or implied; user assumes full liabilities;
not liable for damages due to use or misuse; an equal opportunity abuse
employer; no shoes, no shirt; quantities are limited while supplies last; if
defects are discovered, do not attempt to fix them yourself but return to an
authorised post service centre; caveat emptor; read at your own risk;
parental advisory - explicit words; text may contain material some readers
may find objectionable, parental guidance is advised; not suitable for
children; not suitable for adults; not for human consumption; keep away from
sunlight, pets and small children; limit one-per-family; no money down; no
purchase necessary; to approved purchasers only; facsimiles are acceptable
in South Australia; you need not be present to read this post; some assembly
required; batteries not included; action figures sold separately; no
preservatives added; tools not included; safety goggles may be required
during use; sealed for your protection, do not use if the safety seal is
broken; call before you dig; for external use only; if a rash, redness,
irritation or swelling develops, discontinue use; use only with proper
ventilation; avoid extreme temperatures and store in a cool, dry place; keep
away from open flames, naked flames and old flames; avoid inhaling fumes;
avoid contact with mucous membranes; do not puncture, incinerate, or store
above 60 degrees Centigrade; do not place near flammable or magnetic source;
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only to abstinence, is the use of a good laugh; text used on the post is
made from 100% recycled electrons and magnetic particles; no animals were
used to test the hilarity of this post other than Synapse Syndrome; no salt,
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peanuts; if ingested, do not induce vomiting, if symptoms persist, consult
your humourologist; post is ribbed for your pleasure; slippery when wet;
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valid only in participating newsgroups; slightly higher in South Australia;
allow four to six weeks for delivery; damage from hurricane, lightning,
tornado, tsunami, volcanic eruption, earthquake, flood, orgasm, misuse,
self-abuse, neglect, unauthorised repair, damage from improper installation,
broken antenna, marred cabinet, incorrect line voltage, missing or altered
serial numbers, sonic boom vibrations, electromagnetic radiation from
nuclear blasts or other Acts of God are not covered; incidents owing to
aeroplane crash, ship sinking, motor vehicle accidents, leaky roof, broken
glass, falling rocks, mud slides, forest fire, flying projectiles or
dropping the item are also excluded; other restrictions may apply. If
something offends you, lighten up, get a life, and move on. All conditions
apply. Not available in all stores. Facts have been changed to protect the
guilty.
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